Blogaroo

One of the things that drives me most crazy about my life is that my desk always looks like a hurricane hit it and then, just as it was starting to recover, a herd of elephants walked across it, throwing paper into the air as they passed. The idea of tidy, ordered, perfect rooms fills me with happiness, but in reality I can’t be trusted not to make a mess of anything. I get into clean elevators and by the time we get to the third floor the place is full of junk, with small children drowning in oceans of dust and paper.

It’s not that I don’t try to be tidy – I do, I really do – it’s just that I seem to have a biological need to make things messy. And it’s not that mess doesn’t bother me, because, if I’m honest, it stresses me out more than you I thought possible. It’s just that part of my brain doesn’t think about the things I could do right then and now to improve things.

Part of it, I am sure, is that I don’t live in the perfect clean palace that my head lives in. You know when they go back to the Grand Designs house just after they’re finished, and everything clean and white and stainless steel and slate and there’s no clutter and, despite the fact that there’s no evidence of it really living in the place, there’s a cat – a magic, moult-free cat – slinking around the place like it’s in a sofa advert? That’s the house my head lives in. And because I live in a cluttery flat, my head says what’s the point of trying? Who are you trying to impress? It’ll still look bad anyway.

But my desk is a constant problem. I’m a web designing student, I live at my desk. But between notes and bills and textbooks and to-do lists scribbled on everything I feel lost. I’m sure it affects the quality of what I do. But no matter how much I try to keep things under control, it controls me again within two days.

So here is my pledge of the week: tonight I am going to tidy my desk. And then I am going to tidy it up again every day. File things away every day. I want to be in control for once, and my desk seems like a good place to start. Well, until I’m showing Kevin McCloud round my brand new house, anyway.

Le Friday 5:

1. What’s a pretty good sign that your day at work or school is going to be rough?
I can generally tell before I leave the house - if I don’t like what I’m wearing or don’t feel good in myself then the rest of the day just won’t work.

2. What’s a pretty good sign that your day at work or school is going to be terrific?
If the sun shines, I’m happy, and that always helps.

3. What’s a pretty good sign that you should probably eat out?
When the only thing in the fridge is Quorn. As is currently the case. How did we manage to do a whole shop but the only food-like thing in the place is Quorn?!

4. What’s a pretty good sign that you’re going to spend more money than you should?
If I shop with A. He is way too good at encouraging me to buy things that I really shouldn’t…

5. What’s a pretty good sign that someone you’ve just met is going to be a pretty good friend?
If we can chat away without a problem from the get-go, we’ll be fine. If it’s at all stilted, or awkward, we’re doomed.

This week’s Friday Five:

1. What was the last important thing you were late for?
I am generally never late for anything, usually stupidly early in fact, but my last significant lateness (in my mind) was being late for a doctor’s appointment the other week because a bus didn’t show up. Despite the fact that I was only five minutes late and my doctor was running over half an hour late anyway, I was vaguely mortified.

2. What was the last important thing you were late with?
We are currently later with returning some documents about our flat. I try not to be late with things because it plays on my mind so much and stresses me out, but we’re so undecided about this one that we’ve delayed it until the last minute. And then got an extension. And are still late!

3. What (or who!) is the most frequent cause of your lateness?
Getting distracted, usually by random pages on the internet that I wouldn’t normally read or don’t care about, but still get absorbed by.

4. Which of your close friends or relatives can you expect almost always to be inconveniently late?
A. Not inconveniently so, but he is VERY fond of leaving things until the last minute.

5. What’s most likely to cause you to stay up too late before bed?
If A stays up, I will too, no matter how tired I am. I generally can’t settle until he in bed anyway, so if he’s out I’ll be awake until he’s back, and if he’s coding I’ll wait for him. Oh, and Sudoku!